Imperial Cereal Infusion Ends Serial Material Confusion

Update the Final: Flying Monkeys Craft Brewery Paranormal
(Or, to any Zen Pinball fans, ParaNOHHmal! I can't not read that in the table voice.)

I intended to post this Halloween night, but there was a lot of pumpkin beer around to finish up. Though I responsibly got my photographs and notes together for this on the first drink of the evening, I never did get around to doing any actual writing. After a couple of days of leftover candy (3 kilograms of mini chocolate bars and a fifty-count box of fun size Goldfish and we got four trick-or-treaters - at least those few got some serious loot), I'm ready to conclude this review in style with the fanciest entry. A few cents short of a terrifying thirteen dollars, Paranormal is by far the priciest of the Halloween beers I was able to find locally - but, as always, Flying Monkeys have gone all-out on the presentation. The bottle comes in a collectors' box covered on all sides with a spectacular spooky tableaux, including disembodied brains, movie references, a rather Morbo-like alien, and what I think is the ghost of an evil clown. Additional jokes and flavour text are printed under the flap, and the bottle itself sports the same imagery on a glossy foil label. They might be charging thirteen dollars for a bottle of beer, but Flying Monkeys succeeds at making it seem like an actual collectable - particularly with the on-package promise that it can be cellared for up to two years. Spoiler alert for the remainder of the review, but I was impressed enough with Paranormal (and curious enough about how two years will change it) to find another bottle on November 1st to stash for Halloween 2016.

Paranormal is a 'specialty' beer in every sense of the term, meaning that for every person who loves it, there's going to be one that finds it undrinkable. An Imperial beer (and I sincerely hope the legends are true this style came to be when the court of Catherine II balked at four-percent-alcohol anything), Paranormal is a strong ten percent, complete with the pure-alcohol sweetness inevitable in a brew of this potency. Paranormal is hardly malt liquor, though - well, by definition it is, but you get my point. Intensely flavourful and darkly sweet, it may even be the sought-after malt liqueur

Almost every pumpkin beer promises "pumpkin pie flavours", but very few come as close as claimed - Paranormal genuinely does convey the impression of a slice. The sweetness is undeniable, but interplay with IPA-hopped bitterness complements the rich, sugar-intensive flavour of pumpkin and dark malt well. I do have to stand corrected here - a pumpkin spice India Pale Ale can work, provided the citrus aspects of the bittering are sufficiently muted or absent altogether. A hint of orange zest may be an excellent accompaniment to roasted pumpkin and cinnamon, but a wash of grapefruit pith is entirely incompatible.
The spicing - with cinnamon and nutmeg leading strong, allspice on the finish, and a subtle but undeniable vanilla - contributes a toasty aroma not just of autumn spices, but of actual baking. These aromatics emphasize the impact the already-considerable sweetness, and Paranormal manages to be to pumpkin pie what a glass of medium-priced port is to good fruitcake. Of course, this raises the question: as good as the first piece is, how often does one want a second slice of either?

As visible in the picture above, this is a brew with legs. "Imperial" is the operative term over "India Pale Ale" here - Paranormal is thick and dark, with competition only from Last Bite in these categories. Even Last Bite, at a more modest 6.5%, can't compete with Paranormal's staying power, on the glass or on the palate. Of course, that long stay means you're dealing with a whole scope of sugars for quite a while after each mouthful, and this adds up quickly. While the hops (not listed by name but potent enough to make their presence known) provide some relief with a surprisingly durable bitterness, the earthy pumpkin-and-cinnamon-enhanced sweetness is the dominant presence right through the finish.
Paranormal is an excellent beer-drinking experience, but a very intense one - even one pint-and-a-half bottle is a more than sufficient serving, and I would almost suggest sharing. Not sharing fairly, mind, but parting with a cordial glass or two would be acceptable.

It's hard to think of a more fitting end to the Great Pumpkin Brew Review. Flying Monkeys completely embraces Halloween with Paranormal, from the elaborately ghoulish artwork to the sugar-and-spice alcohol wallop and haunting conclusion. Also, I'll be just about ready for another one in a year. Even a standard Imperial Stout like Wellington's excellent Imperial Russian (known around these parts as "Rubber Boot Stoot") makes a second pint a challenge. Factor in the intense sweetness and spiciness, pale-ale-defying body and outsized bottle of Paranormal, and a second would be outright foolhardiness - it would almost certainly be unpleasant by the end, and run considerable risk of ruining my anticipation of next year's.